I love my wife, Debi. She’s my best friend in this whole world, but that’s not what this is about. This is about how I love my wife.
I carry a field notebook so that I can jot down designs, thoughts, notions, numbers, and groceries. Here is an entry from last week…
I have been knowing you now for two years.
It has now come to the point where I hang onto everything you do –The concept of not liking something you do is meaningless to me– if you do it, I love it.
“If you do it, I love it.”
If you do it, I want to know about it, so I can appreciate you more.
I enjoy unpacking your mannerisms. It’s like Christmas morning to a child, except it’s every morning, every afternoon, every evening … of every day.
I first noticed this attitude during love-making… If you do it, I love it. So everyday life is like making love now.
You are sitting & talking to K___ with your legs propped onto my lap and I am turned on!
“I love you” is less descriptive than “You are my life now.”
You are my life now.
All your warts, all your scars, all your aches & pains.
The way you clasp your hands, the way your toenail polish goes only half-way down your toenails.
So life is like making love and making love is like prayer.
Praying is like conversation.
Conversation is like life.
Being – simply being – with you (when I am aware of it) gives me butterflies in my chest.
A couple separate events caused me to decide to share this:
- I discovered Debi sharing the journal entry with a friend. When I asked her why she would share my private note with another she explained, “I wanted her to know what it is like to be loved.”
- I happened to read a review for the couple’s how-to book, Slow Sex. (I chuckled at one reviewer’s comment, “Just not feeling it right now.” You can’t make this stuff up!)
We bought the book, by the way… (;
I love to make things; I love craft. It turns out that making a relationship is very much a craft (the way we do it, at least). The cool thing about my wife is that she too is passionate about crafting our relationship.
I hope everyone would know what it is like to be loved.